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Tuesday , December 14, 2010

nogoodforme superlatives: Most Beloved Baubles

Laura Jane: She can't quite figure jewelry out

I'm really not much of an accessories fiend by nature. Jewelry makes me feel physically uncomfortable; I'm always hyper-conscious of how some weird piece of metal is hanging around my neck and, like, that's weird. Also, a lot of jewelry looks just plain dumb on me, especially earrings. My ears aren't pierced, but on the rare occasions that I do experiment with clip-ons, the results are ghastly. Anyone who can pull off short hair and earrings without looking like a second grade teacher is seriously a genius.

Anyway, despite my innate antipathy towards self-adornment, I have of course accumulated a semi-gargantuan collection of tacky baubles that I am constantly intimidated and confused by:

jewels.jpg

1. Panther Necklace: This looks really fly with my vintage Nike tank top when I want to do an East L.A thing. I wore it every day for the entire summer of 2006 because I was so excited to finally have found a piece of jewelry I could get on board with.

2. Weird coral chunky thing: This ginormous beaded extravaganza looks really killer with all black and my grey cotton Uniqlo romper, but totally revolting with anything else.

3. Dancing People pin: By some illustrator who probably deserves more credit than this; the only thing I could afford at the entire Dover Street Market.

4. Stars-and-stripes bangles: I brattily wore these on Canada Day; antagonism never goes out of style.

5. Spirit Animal pin: My spirit animal is not actually a hedgehog/wombat/mongoose/guinea pig, okay???

6. Heart-print bangle: Not counting my "Laura" nameplate necklace, this is by far and away my most worn piece of jewelry. It's sweet and girly, but in an understated way.

Kat: Horses, horses, horses

Okay, so it's not quite horse frenzy when it comes to my jewelry selections, but I never met an equine motif that I didn't like. Like Laura, I'm not much of a jewelry person, but the things I do wear are either 1. given to me by people I love or 2. have some sort of personal connection to my imaginative whimsies, and things like horses and leaves fall right into that because they remind me of growing up near farms in Illinois. I rarely wear something to "spruce up an outfit" -- I'm of the school that lets a boring outfit be boring, mostly because I'm lazy. Instead I think my relationship to jewelry borders on the superstitious -- my decisions to wear things are based more on weird inner workings than fashion, like, "Oh, I miss the trees in my backyard" so I wear the leaf necklace, or "I feel down," and then I wear something that makes a pretty noise. It leads to some aesthetic chaos, but I never feel that is a bad thing when it comes to fashion.

katjewelry_superlative.JPG

1. Silver cuff: This is the thing I wear pretty much all the time; I got it in Bangkok after a fierce round of bargaining with a very scrappy young lady. You can't really tell from the picture, but I love the pebbled texture. I like cuffs a lot in general -- they speak to my childhood affection for Wonder Woman and are kind of tough. Plus, my wrists are tiny and most bangles slip off too easily, but a cuff nicely hugs my wrists and stay on. Practicality rules!

2. Lots 'o leaves necklace from Forever 21: I don't care if this is Forever 21, this is pretty much my favorite necklace in the world. The leaves remind me of my favorite tree in my parents' backyard. It makes a cool noise when you shake it, too.

3. Charm bracelet: I got this from Target mostly because I love the picture of the horses on one of the charms. I had this kind of amazing dream with two horses in it once, and since then I've been in love with dual horse images and kind of want them on everything. Fashion-speaking, this bracelet has an old-school quality that I like, too. This also makes a cool noise when you shake it.

4. Skull-y bracelet: The truth is I'm such a goth at heart that I will always love things with skulls and skeletons on them, long before and after Hot Topic polluted the earth. I don't know where this came from because an ex-boyfriend gave it to me. It's got teeny skulls that kind of look like teeth from far away. Some people think that is gross, but whatever.

5. Art Deco earrings: I got these in like 1999 from the Chelsea flea market in New York or the antique market in my hometown -- I can't remember which. I can't believe I've had these for nine years!

6. Horses pin: One of my favorite things when I competed as an equestrian when I was young was all the little horse jewelry you get to wear. This sadly is not from that far back -- I am so not that cool at all -- but I picked this up from some country market back at home and wear it all the time as a brooch in unexpected places.

7. Mismatched earrings: These were my two favorite earrings. I used to have proper pairs of both, but I am a dolt and lost them. Orphaned earrings really make me sad and inadequate-feeling. I am putting a prayer in the universe that I find their twins soon.

8. Python skin cuff: Another cuff! Told you I loved them. I have two or three others, but the silver one and this one are my favorites.

Liz loves the little birdies (and wolves too)

baublesliz.jpg

(Let's do clockwise starting from the upper left corner, shall we?)

1. Okay, see that big gaudy piece of faux-gold that vaguely resembles the weird eye thing living in Kim Basinger's purse in My Stepmother is an Alien? That's actually a cuff. Like Kat, I'm crazy for cuffs and wish I had many more of them, preferably a little less garish than this one.

2. The cuff's sitting on a pile of bangles that I found in a bathroom cabinet in my second L.A. apartment. I have no idea who their rightful owner might be. If you can claim them, leave a comment here and I'll see if we can't work something out.

3. And then sneaking out from underneath the bangles is my Erica Weiner wolf tooth necklace that I bought from Bona Drag last year. (Go here to see a much more detailed shot.) This is probably my favorite piece of jewelry, though sometimes I'll be absentmindedly playing with it and get really freaked out that I'm touching a tooth that once lived inside a real animal's mouth.

4. I have no idea where I bought that little blue ring and I hardly ever wear it anymore, but I still dig on its glitteriness.

5. I hardly ever wear this sparkly-flower bracelet anymore either. I don't really like wearing bracelets. (Or earrings, for that matter, which is why you'll see none here. And I'm not too keen on rings either. I guess I'm just a necklace-and-cuff girl all the way.)

6. This shell-encrusted heart-shaped box isn't a piece of jewelry, but it's kind of bauble-like, no? I got it at an antique shop in Shell Beach last winter, and I keep all my bobby pins inside. I love Shell Beach and very intensely wish I were there right now.

7. I wear my golden dove necklace whenever I want to feel like Mary Timony's second solo record (The Golden Dove, duh), which is fairly often. It's probably her most California album, and on my second-ever visit to L.A. I made myself a tape that had that on one side and Cat Power's You Are Free on the other, and I labeled the case as You Are A Free & Golden Dove. I'm still pretty impressed with myself on that one.

8. The heart-shaped owl necklace is from Frozen Peas, whom we love so much. I bought my little sister the same one a few Christmases ago, but hers is white.

9. My "L" bracelet. I never wear it. (Apparently I'm neglecting the "Most Beloved" aspect of this whole post theme, for some reason. I'm bad at rules today.)

10. And this is the latest addition to my collection of baubles, a long-chained charm necklace purchased at a really stupid mall store. I wear it all the time, especially since my lovely silver-angel-wings-charm necklace has very recently bit the dust. I'm still mourning that one; we were so good together and I was really into how it looked a lot like the Aerosmith logo. In some ways I'm totally passionate about Aerosmith, in case you didn't know. I might even go unearth my Aerosmith shirt from the back of my closet right this very second.

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