Sunday , June 13, 2010
nogoodforme superlatives: TV characters we most relate to
Buffy, c'est moi
Let me make it clear that I do not relate to Buffy because I am blonde and have special Slayer skills and fight vampires when I'm not blogging. I clearly am neither of those things. I related to the Buffster because of the following reasons:
1. She was petite and constantly underestimated because of it.
2. She had a penchant for stylish yet affordable boots.
3. She was a former cheerleader.
4. She had a thing for dudes with a dark side.
5. She had a stuffed pig named Mr. Gordo and I had a stuffed dog named Bocker.
6. She never met a quip she didn't like.
7. She was burdened with great responsibility and sometimes felt kind of isolated because of it.
8. Ever since she used the phrase "a world of no" in the Spike flashback episode (probably my third or fourth favorite episode ever), I haven't been able to stop with it since.
9. She hates driving.
I just realized my part of this entry will make no sense unless you are somehow a Buffyphile. Which is okay -- to start from the beginning of my Buffy journey would just be too intense and would probably make your RSS reader explode. Buffy rules for so many reasons -- the feminist reasons, the awesome action reasons, the epic romance reasons, the high school alienation reasons, the fantastically witty dialogue reasons -- but the show itself is a meta-lesson for never judging a book by its cover. Who knew that a blonde Valley girl could develop such reserves of character, fortitude and a genuine reckoning with power and leadership? Who knows what's hiding in your stylish and affordable boots? (Kat)
Laura Jane Faulds: the Chandler Bing of every group of six she's ever been in
A few weeks ago, I invented a really cool game called "Decide what zodiac signs the Friends characters would be." It was really fun, but sadly, it's the kind of game you can only play once. And you poor unfortunate souls out there can't even play it all, because I already figured out the definitive list, and it goes like this:
Joey Tribbiani: Leo
Phoebe Buffay: Aquarius
Monica Geller: (the world's most obvious) Capricorn
Rachel Green: Taurus
Ross Geller: Libra
Chandler Bing: Cancer
Once I figured out that Chandler Bing was a Cancer (as am I), all the puzzle pieces of my life came together in an instant: Chandler Bing is me. Or maybe: I am Chandler Bing.
My realization that Chandler Bing is a Cancer could potentially be dispelled by some Friends episode out there that explicitly states when Chandler Bing's birthday falls and therefore proves that he isn't a Cancer at all, but if this happens to be the case, all it really reflects is a major error in judgment on behalf of the Friends writing team.
Chandler Bing and Laura Jane Faulds: in the vernacular of the man himself, what don't we have in common? For one thing, we're totally not even the tiniest bit sarcastic at all. For another: nothing ever works out for us! It's a tough life, always getting stuck being the Comic Relief. We're both well-liked, often loved, even, but nobody really wants to be us. In fact, they're actively happy that they aren't! They can tell how insanely difficult it is to be a moody, volatile Cancerian class clown, and are grateful that the burden has been placed upon us and not them. They float through their easy little Earth sign lives, laughing at our jokes, but never really getting it. Chandler Bing is so misunderstood.
(Also: we're both self-deprecating.)
Something I really love about Chandler Bing is how he hates dogs; personally, I love dogs, but I GET IT. I always have some unpopular opinion about something that people absolutely live to pick on me for. One that comes to mind is a severe loathing of tomatoes, which people love to tell me I actually like, but look: they're gross, I'm sorry, I hate them. I also wear a lot more vests than the average person, and the parallels between Chandler's quitting smoking against his will and the hellish experience I anticipate having when the time comes for me to toss out my Benson & Hedges are just too damned striking for comfort.
The upside of being A Chandler, however, is that in the end, his story wraps up more sweetly than anyone's. It was a difficult journey, but in the end: Chandler Bing wins big. This gives me hope. Some Chandler Bing psychoanalysis: I think that from Chandler's perspective, Monica Geller is the girl of his dreams because she is the only human being on the planet more neurotic than he, which gives him a sense of purpose, value and serenity. Chandler & Monica's romance is heart-stabbingly beautiful; I actually cried at the moment when he proposed to her. I pray that one day, like Chandler, I will quit my job as a data processor to pursue my lifelong dream of working for an advertising firm and marry an obsessive-compulsive chef with a lovable older sibling. And if not, whatever. At least I have my funny bone to fall back on.
I'm really glad there are total losers in the world who spend their time doing things like compiling "Best of Chandler Bing" videos which they post to Youtube:
Liz Barker & Liz Lemon: Basically the same person
Actually, nevermind. I haven't even started this post yet and already I'm bored with trying to explain how I'm so much like Tina Fey on 30 Rock. (Although I will tell you that, if I weren't super-cheap, I'd totally buy all the hot dogs.) So instead of Liz-apalooza, I give you this little round-up of my most personally relatable characters from all the greatest shows in the history of television (excepting Taxi, The Love Boat, and Little House, each excluded here for various philosophical reasons).
Freaks and Geeks: Lindsay Weir. (Duh.)
My So-Called Life: Angela Chase. (Duh squared.)
Welcome Back, Kotter: Freddie "Boom Boom" Washington.
Six Feet Under: Federico, the conscientious & terminally cranky family man. Or maybe I'm the wacky hippie aunt who lives in Topanga Canyon and hangs out with Susie Bright. (These be the wild contradictions that dwell within my soul.)
Arrested Development: Michael Bluth. Incompetence exasperates me!
Weeds: More than most things in life, I want to be Gangsta Nancy Botwin a la Weeds S3, but probably I'm more like Celia's husband (post-firing but pre-softail-accident).
Veronica Mars: N/A, or maybe Mac. (Nerd alert!)
Rags to Riches: The overaccessorized, boy-crazy blonde one who loves Elvis too much.
Entourage: Val Kilmer as the pot-dealing sherpa.
The Office: Kelly Kapoor! I love you, Kelly Kapoor! And I love your blog too! Let's be blog friends! Fashion show at lunch!
Kelly Kapoor's Greatest Hits:
Tags: astrology, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Chandler Bing, Mindy Kaling, The Office, Tina Fey, tv, Weeds
Share | 
| 
| 
|
|
Posted by Kat, Liz and Laura in Superlatives |
Permalink |
Leave a comment |
Comments (2)
+ Contact Us
+ HOME
2 Comments!!
Say something so insightful and witty, it will blow us away. (No pressure.)
Got something to say? We'd love to hear it! Name, email and "type in the weirdo drunken text" thingie are all required to comment; don't worry, we won't email you or anything, we just want to make sure you're not an evil spambot. Keeping in mind the good-times mentality we like to keep going here, we've worked hard to keep NOGOODFORME.COM as fun as possible. We welcome all kinds of comments, but insults/abuse/general bitchery are not tolerated. In other words, we put the smackdown on evil troll posts. If you want to be a hater, please go elsewhere. Now, as Salt 'N Pepa say, "Only the sexy people..."
sometimes when i'm having a rough day, i just think about joey putting on all chandler's clothes at once, and then everything's all right.
By Liz
on July 22, 2008 2:16 PM
That's such a great picture of you LJ ;-)
By George Petrovic on July 22, 2008 10:52 PM