Sunday , December 27, 2009
nogoodforme Superlatives: Best Best Pictures
LAURA JANE IS GRUMPY; AMADEUS IS PRETTY GOOD, SHE GUESSES
I am in no way a cinemaphile. Actually, I am a cinema-philistine, which always surprises people, since my taste in other things can be kind of refined sometimes. But, when it comes to the silver screen, I like stoner movies and romantic comedies and kids movies and Beatles movies- definitely nothing French or smart. Amadeus, Dog Day Afternoon and Papillon are some of the only "good" movies that I genuinely love. Of these movies, Amadeus is the only one that won an Oscar for Best Picture. It is also the only Best Picture (besides Gigi, Rain Man and West Side Story) that I like at all. I even thought Oliver! sucked, which is weird, since I usually love orphans.
It is apt that I am writing about Amadeus today because Amadeus is the story of how Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart died a penniless failure, just like Van Gogh and all those other poor people who lived miserable lives and attained fame and notoriety posthumously. It is apt because I am presently terrified that I am going to die a penniless failure with an annoying laugh, just like Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. I hate my job and don't understand why I can't do whatever I want whenever I want. I feel misunderstood. I am paranoid that everybody in my life is a snot-nosed Salieri and are collectively scheming to ensure my demise. I also really hate my job. This is not a very good review of Amadeus. It is mostly just me talking about how much I hate my job. I'm sorry, Amadeus. Amadeus is a great film and deserves better. I wish Smiley Face had won Best Picture. (LJ)
Because Amadeus is not exactly the type of film whose brilliance could best be expressed via a Youtube clip, here is the music video for "Rock Me Amadeus" by Falco (which, for the record, is NOTHING compared to "Puttin' on the Ritz" by Taco):
And, as a bonus treat, here is a semi-funny video of two brothers spoiling the ending of every Best Picture winner in Oscar history (WARNING! CONTAINS SPOILERS!):
TITANIC + THE SOUND OF MUSIC + ANNIE HALL (AN EXCUSE TO TALK ABOUT DUDES SOME STUFF I REALLY HATE)
First off, isn't it weird how American Beauty actually isn't very awesome after all? When it came out I saw it like 85 times in the theater, and then a couple Octobers ago I was watching it in a hotel room in Denver and realized, "Wow, a lot of this movie is really boring and annoying." The whole thing should just be the dinner-table scenes and Kevin Spacey getting stoned in his car. Then it would be my favorite film of all time.
Anyway, these are my three most adored Best Pictures:
1. TITANIC. One of the things I hate most in the world is when people are all attitudey about Titanic. If I've ever told you, "I love Titanic!" and you replied, "Eww, really?", rest assured I've never forgotten it and will probably hold it against you forever. (Soooooorry!) If you legitimately hate this movie and can't find anything to enjoy about it, I guess I can kinda deal. But if you hated it before you saw it, or you hate it even though you've never seen it, or you hate it because it made 80 gazillion trillion dollars at the box office and was in the theater for like nine years, then that's just unforgivably lame.
Also, one of my favorite impressions to do is Kate Winslet calling out to the lifeboats in her creeky frozen voice. It's so good.
2. THE SOUND OF MUSIC. Another thing I hate is when people ask me to explain why The Sound of Music is my favorite movie ever made. It's like asking, "Why do you love Christmas, or sunshine, or homemade strawberry shortcake with real whipped cream, made-from-scratch biscuits, and farm-fresh strawberries?" I LOVE IT BECAUSE I LOVE LOVE. And the part when the nuns fuck up the Nazis' car? Gives me the chills, everytime. I just got the chills typing those two sentences, even.
3. ANNIE HALL. A couple years ago there was this Monday morning when I'd just had a really killer first date with the smokingest-hottest surfer guy the night before, and instead of working I chose to bask in post-date awesomeness by eating strawberry pancakes in bed while watching Annie Hall. Then later in the day I went to pre-shark-jumping Downbeat Cafe and ate the best peanut butter cookie, and it was TRANSPLENDENT. By the way, Annie Hall is so not my favorite Woody Allen movie: That's either Hannah and Her Sisters or Manhattan. (Liz)
NOGOODFORME'S RESIDENT CINEPHILE/BRINGER OF DARKNESS LOVES "IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT," ACTUALLY
I love movies, dudes. It's what I do for a living and with the vast majority of my time, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I honestly like everything, from the cheesiest romantic comedy to the most austere, intellectual French movie ever to the scrappiest, most awesome Slavic gangster comedy. (Such a movie does exist, and it's called Black Cat, White Cat, directed by the awesome Emir Kusturica.) Maybe you'd expect me to pick one of the more artier Best Pictures as my Best Best Picture, and I'm actually sorely tempted to pick The Silence of the Lambs because I do think it's a great piece of filmmaking and utterly riveting every time I see it, and it's kind of the most perverse thing to pick. But actually, out of that great, vast list of Best Pictures, the film I have the most affection for is the 1934 screwball comedy It Happened One Night, directed by Frank Capra and starring Clark Gable and Claudette Colbert. These days romantic comedies are, for the most part, sexist, classist pieces of cinematic excrement with no soul or genuine wit, but in the 1930s they were often great, full of beautiful clothes, dashing dudes, rat-a-tat dialogue and spirited heroines who had other things going on inside of them besides a desperate desire to be in a relationship. I saw It Happened One Night when I was six on a day I was home sick from school, and it totally charmed and entertained me. I've seen about a million movies in my life since then (including most of the Best Picture winners, actually) but I always go back to It Happened One Night for its knowing yet innocent charm. (And just for the record, I was also thinking of picking Annie Hall, The Deer Hunter or Midnight Cowboy because I effin' love those films pieces to pieces, but when else am I going to be able to write about 1930s screwball comedies except in class? And I also think most of the Best Pictures since the 1990s are travesties. Who the hell watches Braveheart anymore? Gag!) (Kat)
Tags: cinema-philistinism, hate, job hatred, Kate Winslet, Laura loves The Beatles, love, Oscars, penniless failures, Smiley Face, strawberries, surfers, The Sound of Music, transplendence, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Woody Allen
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4 Comments!!
Say something so insightful and witty, it will blow us away. (No pressure.)
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I remember watching Black Cat, White Cat in a crumbling house in New Orleans while eating quiche and feeling like everything was all right in the world.
Actually, I have strong associations with a lot of the movies mentioned here! And I feel the same way about American Beauty, Liz. How did that happen?
By Meggy
on February 24, 2009 4:24 PM
in regards to your titanic post, damn straight, if somebody says to me that they didnt like 'that' movie titanic, i take it as a personnel insult and make it my mission to make them see more clearly on the subject. I believe it was my destiny in this world to spread the word of titanic to the people.
i am so pleased to know there are more fans still out there, they seem to be dieing out, or at least hiding their passion for the great cinematic master piece.
Also my favourite quote is 'who is he this freud? is he a passenger? mainly for the way he says passenger, thats some god damn talented acting.
x
By clara on February 25, 2009 10:37 AM
Did The Apartment win best picture? I can't remember. If it did then that's my favorite, but It Happened One Night would have to come second! My sister and I saw it in high school when we weren't even into old movies and we thought it was the greatest.
By Rhiannon on February 26, 2009 12:53 AM
i think The Apartment did win Best Picture! that is a great, great movie!!! xo kat
By Kat
on February 26, 2009 5:05 PM