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Tuesday , December 14, 2010
Laura Jane's Addiction: Sunglasses, Disassociation, Oliver Goldsmith Vintage
La vie et moi, nous combattons comme freres.
I love life; I hate life. Life loves me; life treats me like I'm its dirty little bitch. I'm not your bitch, life! Get a grip on your "abusing Laura Jane" problem. It hurts people, namely ("scilicet") me. Which is why I like disassociation.
The other day, I was telling one of my roommates about my never-ending goal: to get drunk alone at my Dad's apartment, go out for a ruse-y "headphones walk" at approx. midnight AM, walk down along The Esplanade to the painted-purple punk house where all the babes live, self-assuredly introduce myself to the 187567858 hot punk dudes getting drunk on the patio, then spend the remainder of my evening pounding cans of PBR and "talking in code" with them. My roommate told me not to wear headphones before doing this, because wearing headphones forces you to disassociate, and might hinder one's ability to interact with sexy babes. I agreed that wearing headphones is disassociative, but the difference between her and I is that existing in my optimal disassociative state (wearing headphones and sunglasses) is a given- in my life, there is no walking anywhere without headphones & sunglasses, or one of them at least.
I never used to wear sunglasses, but now that I've figured out how important disassociation is to my happiness, I always wear sunglasses. That way, when life is in the mood to be an asshole to me, I remain unmoved and unaffected. I run through life with shields over my eyes and ears; who the Helter Skelter cares? When I want to talk to hot punk babes, all I have to do is take them off.
Seen above are all the pairs of sunglasses I own. They are all from H&M. I don't really like or care about any of them. My sunglasses thing has almost nothing to do with fashion, and almost everything to do with my immense distaste for existence. But since sunglasses have recently become an integral component in my quest towards sanity, I should probably invest in some sunglasses that don't totally suck. I was looking at Chloe and Tom Ford ones the other day; they were all pretty much lame. But then I found out about Oliver Goldsmith (apparently the most important/influential sunglasses designer of all time?), came across his vintage sunglasses archives, and fell in love like I never thought I could, with sunglasses or anything. I would die for them!!!!!
2. "The Ogle", 1968 (Ooooh! Like David Bowie! If David Bowie were a scuba-diver!)
3. "The Rimini," 1964 (For days when I want to pretend that I am not a scrappy goof; such days occur approx. 3 out of 365 days of the year)
4. "The Oops," 1973 (These are just straight-up hot. Why doesn't H&M make sunglasses that look more like The Oops?)
5. "Tennis Rackets," 1950 (Jibe really amazingly with my Summer 09 Fashion Concept, to be revealed in approx. 12 days; also, whoa, really forward-thinking for nineteen-freaking-fifty)
6. "The 'Love Me'", 1979 (Am particularly taken with the "Love Me," since they can help me achieve my dream of tapping into the intense awesomeness of my new Style Icon, the purple-haired seven-year-old dude-baby I saw on the street riding a longboard and wearing heart-shaped sunnies earlier today.)
Tags: disassociation, hot dudes, if David Bowie were a scuba-diver, Laura Jane's Addiction, life & I's complex relationship, Oliver Goldsmith, PBR, sunglasses, tennis rackets, The Spice Girls, vintage
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