Sunday , June 13, 2010
WHY I WANT TO GET LAID IN JAPAN, by Laura Jane Faulds
As I so brilliantly wrote on Tuesday, I wish there was astrology-themed everything. Perhaps a cool project for me would be to split up all the Beatles songs into different astrological categories, and then there would be an Astro-Beatles Mix for every zodiac sign! Yes. There is a 100% chance I'm going to do this. So that's something to live for!
Anyway, the other day I Googled something along the lines of "astrology + Japan," because I knew there was no way in Hell, or Japan, such a Google search wouldn't pay off. It paid off!
In Japan, they sell astrology-themed condoms! THAT IS SO COOL. Last Monday, I Twittered, "In Japan, they sell astrology-themed condoms, so sign me up. For having sex in Japan," and then Anabela @messaged me saying "I wonder if they have compatibility charts on them. All like "Do NOT stick it in Virgo." The Twitterverse collectively LOLed. Anabela is an inspiration. I took the joke and ran with it, Twittering such astro-sexy gems as Congratulations on making it with a Scorpio! Get ready for some seriously FUCKED UP SHIT and Oh that's cool that you're boning a Cancer. She's going to think you're her boyfriend tomorrow and Yay! A Capricorn! I hope you like the missionary position!
Then I stopped myself, because I've only made it with so many Zodiac signs, and I wouldn't want to be a bitch to any air signs I may or may not have slept with. Here's the whole lot!
L to R: Aquarius, Pisces, Aries. Cutest: Pisces!
L to R: Taurus, Gemini, Cancer. Cutest: Taurus! Which is too bad. In real life, you couldn't pay me to sleep with a Taurus. Maybe in Japan, though
L to R: Leo, Virgo, Libra. Cutest: OMG SOOOOO LEO!
L to R: Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn. Cutest: Are you kidding me? So obviously Capricorn. The goat-beard!
Tags: astrology, astrology-themed everything, Japan, Laura Jane Faulds, Laura Loves The Beatles, sex
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7 Comments!!
Say something so insightful and witty, it will blow us away. (No pressure.)
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This rules so much! Oh god the goat beard!
Do you have any suggestions for good books as an introduction to astrology? I've been finding myself really interested in this stuff lately but I don't know a ton about it.
By Steph on March 4, 2010 8:44 PM
THE ONLY ASTROLOGY BOOK YOU'LL EVER NEED by Joanna Martine Woolfolk- really is the only astrology book you'll ever need
By Laura
on March 4, 2010 9:16 PM
yay! I'm a leo and I'm so glad the leo condom is AWESOME.
By Rachel on March 5, 2010 4:52 AM
Yeah Aries, woo!
By JP on March 7, 2010 4:14 AM
I was wondering what your zodiac sign is. Good to know
By Laura
on March 7, 2010 7:15 AM
Me? Yeah?
By JP on March 8, 2010 12:28 AM
Yeah you JP!
By Laura
on March 8, 2010 7:11 PM