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Tuesday , December 14, 2010
Heavy Rotation, Special Cancerian Wack Attack Edition: Suede, Jane's Addiction, Hole, Fairport Convention, Drake ft. Kanye West, Lil Wayne and Eminem, the Standells
Being a Cancerian is a huge part of my self-identity, and accepting the fact that I am really a Cancer and not a Scorpio has been a major part of my journey as a human being. (Someone really needs to write an essay about astrological sign envy one day.) I was on this kick of being "spiritually Scorpio" a long time ago 'cause it's the gothiest sign of the zodiac (and I do have Pluto in my first house, which somehow "darkens" my personality a bit.) But I've gotten on the C-train and just ran with the fact that being a Cancer lets me be ridiculously fun-bananas and crazy-bananas all at once, gives me heart and soul and huge reservoirs of intuition and sensitivity and imagination, plus I get a legit excuse for being a freakin' crybaby sometimes. This song epitomizes the "storm of drama" that is being a Cancerian: it's hugely sentimental yet kind of arch about it, both flippant and dead earnest, and it's something you have to listen to a few times to really appreciate its beauty and complexity. You can tell that Suede is trying not be maudlin, decided "Fuck it," and then embraced the dripping emotion with all the flair in the world without any apologies. This song's genius is precisely its emotionality! And so is yours, Cancer! "Stay Together" is the sonic metaphor for Cancerians of "How to Make Being A Cancerian Work For You (And Not Against You, Which Is So Often the Case.)" Now excuse me while I go plan my world domination strategy and get fed cupcakes by my favorite dude who will no doubt say something that I will interpret as mean and make me pout the rest of the night. Man, it's a lot of work to be a Cancer. (Kat)
Every Cancerian, including myself, has what LJ geniusly called a "secret-sweetheart" side. This song is pretty much mine. (Kat)
The one thing that never really gets discussed about Cancers is how we have innate access to serious aggro and aggression. We get reduced to being maternal softies who like to cook and be all gooey and make googly-eyes at babies and boyfriends, and while WE ARE DEFINITELY SWEET TO THE POINT OF UNBELIEVABILITY SOMETIMES, we do have tough, highly developed protective shells and personae that shield our sensitivities and insecurities and kinky sexualities. But even more important, Cancers have that cardinal zodiac energy that makes us a "get shit done and get it started" type of deal, which is usually a good thing, until it comes to dealing with serious negative emotion. All the water signs have innate emotional intensity, but the toxic side of such #$%@#$%@# feelings are expressed differently depending on each sign's energy: Pisces, being mutable signs, sometimes live in the miasma of self-delusion, and Scorpios, being fixed signs, can be so rigid and stubborn that you just want to shove them off an iceberg. Cancers, being cardinal signs, need to push and direct emotional energy and MAKE IT DO SOMETHING. If it doesn't, we get frustrated, feel stuck and make ourselves and everyone around us miserable. Basically, when we're crossed, that cardinal energy turns us from stuffed animals into fucking Chucky dolls. The lesson is: don't fuck with a Cancer. We seem all touchy-feely and goofy, but when we feel like someone's messing with us, we easily turn our empathic emotional abilities and intuition into a talent for emotional mayhem and WE WILL TAKE YOU DOWN AND DESTROY YOUR FACE OFF. Oh, and Courtney Love is a Queen Cancerian, and that's why I picked this song. (Kat)
I'm a crybaby. A big cryey crybaby, who cries a lot. I cry if I don't feel like going to work today, I cry if a celebrity I don't care about dies, I cry if the moon is pretty, I cry when I see hot dads be cute with their cute babies on the street. My big "crying opinion" is that if you want to cry, you should cry. Crying is fun! Sit alone in your room, and cry that shit out, Laura Jane. Cry like the crazy Cancer you are. Never look back.
My point being, "The Ballad of Easy Rider" by (the?) Fairport Convention is totally my number one crying song, which doesn't make much sense, because I don't like Fairport, I hate ballads, and I never even seen the movie Easy Rider. But I don't know, I guess when I'm crying I like to keep it kinda trad; this song sounds like it would be playing over the sad part of a rom-com, when the dude and the chick who will eventually fall in love have been cruelly torn apart by fate, and now are both boredly going about their daily lives without each other, and it's SAD. I also wanted to point out that I never listen to this song when I'm not crying, because Sandy Denny's all "Flow, River, Flow," and then I'm all, "God that is so HOKEY!" (Laura Jane)
"Forever" by Drake, featuring everyone in the world who is cool, is my favourite song ever this week, and it's also my most-listened to song, and really, I just love it. Love it. At first, I was going to try "deciding who Drake, Kanye, Lil Wayne, and Eminem would be if they were the Beatles" on for size, but then I realized: there is simply no comparing Lil' Wayne to the Beatles. That's the kind of shit that makes peoples' brains explode. Lil' Wayne is neither John, Paul, George or Ringo. Lil' Wayne is unique unto himself. He's my hero now.
Okay, so "Forever" starts out with a pretty decent verse from "Drake." Drake is cool to me because he hails from Forest Hills, Toronto, but is now a member of Lil Wayne's crew. I'm very proud, that a Torontonian made it into Lil Wayne's crew. I think that if Lil Wayne knew more about what Forest Hills is actually like, he wouldn't have let Drake into his crew, but that's okay. We all make mistakes, even Lil Wayne. Drake's verse is mostly about how he succeeded in the rap industry independently and without help from anyone, which is pretty admirable for sure. My favourite Drake lyric is when he tells me to come find him swimming in money, and then he says "Nemo." I think that's pretty pussy and lame, to rhyme about FInding Nemo. I do, however, also think it's innovative.
Up next is the Kanye verse, which was my favourite "Forever" verse for a long time, until it was recently usurped by the Lil Wayne verse, yesterday. Kanye's verse is about the dark side of celebrity. "You can have it back," he tells the cosmos, re: his own fame. I feel that, Kanye. Go ahead. Hate your celebrity. Fine by me! My third-favourite Kanye lyric in "Forever" is when he says "You would think I ran the world just like Michelle's husband," which is just so gorgeously pro-woman! My second-favourite Kanye lyric in "Forever" is when he says "He's such a fuckin' loser, he ain't even go to class- BUELLER," because it sounds cool, and I think the "Bueller" rhyme is a strange and interesting stretch. But, more importantly, my favourite Kanye lyric in "Forever" is when he says "I stuck my dick into this life until that bitch came," which speaks directly to my soul, and basically is my new motto. Unlike Kanye West, I'm still in the "sticking my dick into this life" phase of "sticking my dick into this life." But one day, Laura Jane, this bitch will come. And what a fine, fine day it will be.
Which brings me to my next point: LIL WAYNE'S VERSE. While Drake chose to interpret the song's "Forever" concept to mean that he wants fame forever, and then Kanyeezy wrote about how he doesn't want fame forever, Lil Wayne went ahead and decided to talk about how he wants gardens forever. And I don't think "gardens" is a metaphor for anything, except maybe weed, which is also awesome. Mostly, I think Lil Wayne just wants gardens, and that's the greatest thing I've ever heard. I want gardens forever too, Lil Wayne. I am exactly like Lil Wayne in every single way. My new opinion is that Lil Wayne is the most important recording artist of the 21st century so far, and my other new opinion is that I'm the Lil Wayne of Literature, which is really exciting for me. I also really love the part about rollercoasters, and the part about how he doesn't even have to try very hard to be the best rapper in the game, which is sort of the Lil Wayne equivalent of how John Lennon was a major "Beatles-slacker," so I guess I was wrong, and Lil Wayne is the John Lennon of our day.
Oh yeah, and then the Eminem verse totally sucks and is boring, which is disappointing, because normally I love Eminem. So those are all my "Forever" opinions. Enjoy! (LJ)
Conversely, sometimes bad guys don't wear black. Nothing in life is ever as it seems. The Standells understand this, about human existence. The Standells are basically geniuses. Working class heroes, if you will. I like when they say "FLAKE OFF!" It's so ineffectual, as an insult. (LJ)
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