Nostalgia: Courtney Love's Lollapalooza Diary

Apparently I'm attending Lollapalooza this year. I haven't gone since 1995, a time when we all fleetingly believed that Elastica might take over the world. (And why didn't they? Boo.) It was my first time seeing Sonic Youth, second-to-last time seeing Pavement, only time seeing Hole. The last one was the most exciting for me, and just a little while back I was reliving my Hole-at-Lolla memories by digging through the tour diary that Courtney Love wrote for Spin many moons ago. Of course it's really juicy stuff and funny as hell - my favorite bits have to do with Courtney's likening the supposedly testosterone-deficient tour to The Breakfast Club "minus Judd Nelson's sexy, shit-disturbing John Bender character to make it interesting." ("I have Bender-like qualities, obviously," she says, "but I'm the girl in the back of the room putting dandruff on the snowstorm.") And then there's the whole thing about her bet with Stephen Malkmus to see who could best tackle the New York Times Sunday crossword. ("If I lost, I had to play in X-Girl cords, an X-Girl T-shirt, and Pumas with no laces; if he lost, he had to down tequila shots, go on stage, do a Pearl Jam song with absolutely no irony, and then stage dive. My end of the wager may sound simpler, but for me it was a major tall order.")

But the icing on the cake has to be Courtney's recounting of her giving Kathleen Hanna good wallop backstage. Totally ridiculous, but damn if I wouldn't just love to be able to dial this shit up on YouTube right now:

"It's after our set - before Sonic Youth's - and I'm onstage talking to Beck when Eric comes up and says, 'Kathleen's behind you. You should give her some candy and freak her out.' And there she was, sort of smirking at me. I dropped my sweater on the floor, and she sort of whispered under her breath, 'Where's the baby? In a closet with an IV?' I just snapped. My hand was filled with Skittles, and a couple of Tootsie Rolls. I just threw them up I the air and went, 'BAAAAAAAAA!' And then she shoved me and I clocked her. This all happened within five seconds. These big bodyguards grab us, and we're both being lifted up, and she's screaming and screeching all sorts of things at me, and I was laughing at her, like 'Go feed the fucking homeless or something.' I think I had a bag of tostadas as well, mixed in with the candy, so it was raining candy and tostadas everywhere. K.H. said that I attacked her and that I was on drugs and psychotic; you know, all the things that the hicks in Peoria would eat up. Then she went into Sonic Youth's room and tattled and told them this totally exaggerated, insane story about how I had attacked her out of the blue and sucker-punched her, when in fact I had nine or ten witnesses to the contrary. She charged that I was jealous of her band, that I was ripping off Bikini Kill. I laughed really hard at that one."

Sadly, I can't find any videos of Hole at Lollapalooza. But this one's from around that time and fabulously captures Courtney in full-on jerk mode.

Sick: A Love Story

One of the most important media events of my youth was this fashion spread that appeared on the pages of Details magazine in '93: It was all made up to look like scenes from a short film, starring Sofia Coppola, her then-beau Anthony Kiedis, and one Miss Debbie Harry. The premise is that Debbie's a wicked-fairy-godmother type who's plotting to transform Anthony into some sort of rock-and-roll phenom, dragging him all around New York City for makeovers and extravagant flea-market shopping sprees. Then the virtuous Sofia whisks him away and they hang out at a guitar shop with Sonic Youth for a while, till they somehow end up back in Debbie's clutches. Then Anthony flees again, chased down the Bowery by a throng of screaming fans, all whilst wearing only his knickers (of course!).

Got all that? I was gonna post the entire spread here, but it ended up being like the most gigantic thing ever and really unwieldy. So here's just a few of my favorite shots.

1. This is the opening photo, though the spread did also feature a fold-out fake-movie-poster thing emblazoned with the make-believe film title (Sick). I tried to scan that but it came out all stupid.

2. This shot's pretty grainy but I just hugely dig that jacket. I hope he ended up buying it.

3. This is the lovers escaping evil Debbie. Look how cute! Although I don't understand what Sofia's wearing!

4. And here we are in the guitar shop with Kim Gordon and...a bunch of random dudes. Can you spot Thurston?

5. That is a hot car. Nice job, Debbie. R.I.P., CBGB.

6. OMG, it's Sofia and Debbie in love! But what most fascinates me most about this shot is that bottle of Budweiser planted right before Sofia. Do you think she really drank it?

7. And here's the closer. Anthony's my favorite ever, so I find this infinitely charming. Equally charming is the fact that he and Sofia had such similar hair throughout their courtship. Have you ever dated somebody who had the same hair as you? I tried it once and it was a trip and a half. Highly recommended.