HEY YOU! NOGOODFORME.COM is now found at...NOGOODFORME.COM! You've stumbled upon our old mirror site instead. Please point your browsers to NOGOODFORME.COM instead and update your newsfeed to http://feeds.feedburner.com/nogoodforme/tYOS. Thanks and we shall see you at NOGOODFORME.COM!
Monday , June 21, 2010
Dream Dude: Kevin Ayers Singing "Shouting In A Bucket Blues"
Sorry, Ray! Kevin Ayers is totally Youtube-video-cockblocking you on your birthday. This is my favourite song in the world today, and Kevin Ayers looks like an angel. A cherub! I'm really into his yellow beaded necklace, and the sleeves of the guitar-player's jacket.
Tuesday , June 8, 2010
Dream Dude: Noel Fielding
Today I watched one episode of The Mighty Boosh, and then I Wikipediaed Noel Fielding, because he's a babe, and I'm interested in those types. Then I Google Image Searched Noel Fielding, and looked at many photographs of Noel Fielding, because he's hot. I found out he once dated Courtney Love, and then I watched some videos of him performing stand-up comedy on Youtube, and then I watched this other video, where he's talking about Brian Eno, and he's really cute. So, at this point, I'm basically the world's foremost expert on Noel Fielding, and I believe that he should be my boyfriend, especially in the photograph seen above, which is my favourite Noel Fielding photograph on ALL Google Image Search. I don't know who that stupid girl is, the one he's holding hands with, but she's probably just one of those "cool" (more like "coolish"!!!!) Londoney socialite sort of people, like Pixie Geldof, so he should break up with her.
Like, it's so weird, you know? How perfect for one another Noel Fielding and I are. We're a "match made in heaven," if you will. For starters, he's a Gemini, which is my fifth-favourite zodiac sign on a dude, so that's a score for Noel Fielding. That I would date him, I mean. Secondly, he dated Courtney Love, which means he's down to date crazy people, so that's nice of him. If you don't date crazy people, that's a dealbreaker, for me. Last but not least, sometimes I think it's kind of, like, gay, when dudes care about clothes or whatevs. Or maybe it just makes me feel important, when I get to tell them what to wear. But really? I changed my opinion. Dudes should wear this more. This, as in, "what Noel Fielding is wearing in the photograph seen above." This is a GREAT look. A cowboy hat with a flower applique, a zebra scarf, a caftan, jeans, and red ankle boots. Why didn't I think of that? More importantly, why didn't every dude I've ever dated think of that? I am being in no way facetious when I say that I am presently picturing every dude I've ever dated and/or had a crush on wearing this outfit, and I like them all better for it, in my head. In conclusion, I hate all dudes who aren't Noel Fielding in this photograph. Fuck all those asshole motherfuckers, walking around like they're not totally gross and lame for not wearing this outfit. Ew.
Saturday , May 8, 2010
Dream Dude: Graham Nash, A Pencil, His Ribcage & A Shaving Mirror
Graham Nash looks a lot like George Harrison, only way less of a babe. But, at the end of the day, you just have to suck it up and forgive dudes for being less of babes than George Harrison. They all are.
Saturday , March 27, 2010
Dream Dude: Cab "The Reefer Man" Calloway
Cab Calloway was a stoner, a scatter, and a Christmas Day Capricorn. As if I could resist a dude who nicknamed himself "The Tarzan of Harlem"! I agree with everything Cab Calloway ever said and did. If I ever have a third-born son, I'm going to name him Cab Calloway Jane Faulds.
It's so cool, in my opinion, to call "practicing music" "frisking some whiskers." What's more, clarinets are called "licorice sticks," and trombones are called "slush-pumps"!
I agree with everything Cab Calloway ever said and did.
*The year Ray Davies was born
Tuesday , March 16, 2010
Dream Dude: Michael "Mike" Nesmith of the Monkees
Mike Nesmith is the only Monkee worth having a crush on. There are no other options.
Davy Jones is too short. I just read on the Internet that Davy Jones was 4'7" when he was 16. That's weird. Then I found this picture, on the Internet. Everything about that picture is creepy to me. Probably to you, too. To anybody! I'm pretty sure Davy Jones is 5'1". So, if you are a babe who is five feet tall,I'm pro- you having a crush on Davy Jones. He's cute-ish. But, if you are a woman of average height, you shouldn't have a crush on Davy Jones. Unless you are a pedophile.
Peter Tork is clearly the dipshit of the century. There is no doubt in my mind that Peter Tork would suck at sex. When I was eleven, I used to always watch this documentary about the Monkees that they over-played on MuchMoreMusic, and there was this one part where Peter Tork talks about his Monkees audition-interview, and the interviewer was all, "Do you smoke?", offering him a cigar or whatevs, and Peter Tork was all, "Not that," all sly, like "heh-heh-heh, I smoke pot," and you could tell that old man Peter Tork just thought he was so badass for that, which he wasn't.
Micky Dolenz is actually kind of acceptable to have a crush on. In my opinion he looks like a) a weird jock who specializes in volleyball b) a sloth, and/or c) a Monchichi doll, but maybe that works for you. The main thing preventing me from having a crush on Micky Dolenz is that sometimes his hair is straight and sometimes his hair is curly, which means that he either straightens or perms his hair. That's what I like to call a DEALBREAKER. Be a man, Micky Dolenz. Accept your natural hair texture.
Mike Nesmith has killer personal style. His hat may be gimmicky, but it's also adorable! The pictures above demonstrate what Mike Nesmith dresses like when he's not wearing his gimmicky hat: adorably. I have such a soft spot for aggressive sideburns. That picture of him with the family is so sweet. His jeans fit him great. Normally I wouldn't be much into that "Triumph" t-shirt, but it works really well for Mike Nesmith. Great job, Mike Nesmith. You know your strengths.
+ Continue reading "Dream Dude: Michael "Mike" Nesmith of the Monkees"
Sunday , October 25, 2009
Dream Dude: Elliott Gould in 1971
Elliott Gould (the hot one on the left) circa 1971 was an extremely sexy beardo, in my opinion, although I don't have much respect for people who dressed like it was 1967, in 1971. Elliott Gould's outfit in the photograph at left is like the 1971 equivalent of dressing up hella-electroclash in 2009. Lame, Elliott Gould. But, you know, I'll forgive hot dudes for pretty much anything. So: GREAT. Great call, Elliott Gould. You look AWESOME. Though nowhere near as awesome as the chick who you appear to be dating. Is this chick famous? If not, that's a travesty, since she's seriously fly.
Since it's Hallowe'ek and all, I wanted to point out that "Elliott Gould circa 1971" would make a really killer Hallowe'en costume, if you happen to be a dude with a beard who doesn't feel like dressing up as Rooftop John or Rooftop Paul this year. Everybody will be like, "Oh, are you a hippie?" and you'll be all, "No, you imbecile. I'm Elliott Gould circa 1971. Isn't that obvious?" and they'll be all, "Oh yeah, I totally saw that picture of Elliott Gould circa 1971 Laura Jane from nogoodforme.com posted to nogoodforme.com last Sunday morning, that's totally who you are. I'm retarded for missing that." and you'll be like, "Yeah you are! I recently divorced Barbra Streisand." and then you can make jokes about how in the future you will play Ross & Monica Geller's Dad on the popular television show Friends, and it will be the BEST HALLOWE'EN EVER.
Saturday , September 13, 2008
Dream Dude: John McEnroe
If there's one trait I can't resist in a dude, it's a complete inability to control himself. John McEnroe is definitely the loosest cannon in the history of all professional athleticism; in other words, John McEnroe is totally the John Lennon of tennis. And if there's one trait I can't resist in a dude (besides a severe deficit of self-control, that is), it's "being a John". It also helps when said cyclonic, out-of-control, Lennon-esque jerk happens to be wearing little shorts and has big poofy Jeff Lynne hair tamed by a red sweatband.
Over the past couple days, my favorite activity in the world has become Youtubing videos of classic John McEnroe tantrums. Homeboy's a madman! I'd probably assume he was an alcoholic if he wasn't so on-the-ball about, um, literally being on-the-ball, and besides: who needs alcoholism when you have rage issues this extreme? It's gorgeous. McEnroe's on-the-court free-form freak-outs are hilarious, sexy and totally commendable. John McEnroe is basically the smartest person ever. He understands how toxic it can be for the human psyche to suppress your anger- you need to get that negativity out!
Throw your racket on the court, John McEnroe! Tell that stodgy British umpire who's boss! ANSWER MY QUESTION, JERK!
Seen below is my personal favorite Youtube compilation of John McEnroe at his most irrationally, irascibly aggressive. This video is the best thing I have ever posted to nogoodforme.com. I hope you all watch it a billion times.