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Monday , October 26, 2009
FOR A DATE WITH: The "Famous Dead People" Edition
What would you do if the ghost of a sexy celebrity rose from the dead and asked you out on a date? Obviously: go to Topshop!
It's HALLOWE'EK on nogoodforme.com (and also, like, not on nogoodforme.com)! I can't think of a spookier way to kick off the undeadly festivities than summoning up some fake dates with some famous dead people! The collages say "ghosts", but I'm not really tied down to just "ghosts." Dead people can also be zombies. I'm really into the idea of dating "Zombie JFK", and maybe "Denny Wilson Frankenstein"! "Werewolf Keith Moon"! Brian Jones can be a witch, Kurt can be a ghost still, and SId Vicious is a kitty-cat! He can wear a cute little headband with cute little kitty-cat ears, just like I did, last Hallowe'en.
Dating the Undead is smart! Zero commitment. Where do you think JFK's Zombie Ghost would take me on our fake date? I hope to a Dead People Red Sox game. It would be so cool! An old-timey baseball "match", with ghost baseball players from 1919 and shit. Their dead-red sox could match my shoes!
PS: I just need to state for the record that I would NEVER DATE SID VICIOUS IN A HUNDRED THOUSAND BILLION TRILLION YEARS, even if he was dead and wearing a kitty-cat costume.
PPS: JFK was a Gemini, Kurt was a cool Pisces/Aquarius cusp, Sid Vicious was a Taurus, Keith Moon was a losery Leo/Virgo cusp, Brian Jones was a Pisces, and Denny Wilson was a cutie-cute Sag.
Tags: Brian Jones, Dead Jackie O, dead people, Denny Wilson, For A Date With, ghosts, Hallowe'en, JFK, Keith Moon, Kurt Cobain, Sid Vicious, Topshop, zombies
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Monday , June 22, 2009
FOR A DATE WITH: The Resort 2010 Edition
A new opinion I have is that wearing designer clothing is actually pretty gauche. It's so tacky, to flaunt your wealth like that! Get some class, Rich People!
But all that aside, some designer clothing is cool and beautiful, definitely preferable to Zara. Resort collections are always interesting to me, because shit's kickier, and there are less pieces to look at, so I get less bored clicking through endless parades of nothingness on style.com. I have already explained this twice, since I always post about resort collections, since they are interesting to me (because shit's kickier, less clothes, less bored, etc.)
As we all know, I'm off the market right now (LYING), because I am in a committed long-term relationship with Laura "The Dude Of My Dreams" Jane Faulds. I chose some fake date outfits for a date with her, too, but really, the best part of being in a relationship as serious as this one is that fantasies about other relationships become richer. Oh God. Just take me to "a resort," Don Draper of Mad Men.
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Tags: 40s, Balenciaga, Chris Benz, Christopher Kane, Dean Wareham, dogs, Don Draper, fake dates, finaglin' a bagel, freebasing, gutter punks, imaginary dream dates, imaginary drug dealers, Laura "The Dude Of My Dreams" Jane Faulds, Laura loves the Beatles, Stella McCartney, Toronto
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Tuesday , April 28, 2009
FOR A DATE WITH: Laura Jane Takes Topshop- Volume 5,000,000
Oh, life! Your ceaseless trend towards the cruelly ironic never fails to amaze me! As if "For A Date With" days don't rub salt in the Oh God I Am So Single wound enough as it is, I just realized that today is my one-year anniversary of singletonism! Ouch. Is that normal? It seems like it can't be. How is it possible that I have made it through an entire year of romantic nothingness? I am a real trooper not to have committed suicide after three hundred and sixty-five straight days of my love life taking place solely within fake date outfit collages composed of images ganked from the Topshop website.
I was going to use this installment of "For A Date With: Scoresie Malorsies from the Greatest Store in the World" to celebrate the opening of Topshop's Soho outpost, creating looks based around hypothetical New York nabe-based dates, but, like, that's lame. I'm not Bond flippin' No. 9 over here. As if Grigori Rasputin could be bothered with strolling across the Williamsburg bridge and noshing on cinnamon toasties from Babycakes.
Come to think of it, maybe I've been single for a year because I do things like write weird Internet love letters to Rasputin on my website. Or perhaps dudes are just intimidated by my awesomeness? Either way- if I were in love, I'd probably be way too lazy to spend my evenings creating collages for you lucky readers of nogoodforme.com to check out. Three cheers for productivity!
Tags: Chuck Bass, for a date with, Grigori Rasputin, Laura Jane + Grigori Rasputin= Love Forever, LSD, Michael Showalter, Rasputin, serial killers, serial killers with hearts of gold, Seth Meyers, Seth Meyers should date Laura Jane Faulds, singletonism, Sydney Fife, Timothy Leary, Topshop
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Monday , February 23, 2009
FOR A DATE WITH: The New York Fashion Week Edition
If I'm going to be fantasizing about expensive clothes, I might as well be fantasizing about hot dates, too! As follows is what happens when you leave Laura Jane alone with style.com, a hyperactive imagination, Photoshop skillz, and a day off. Enjoy!
PS: New York Fashion Week kind of sucked. My favourite shows were Julian Louie, Christian Cota, Temperley London, and Jonathan Saunders.
from left: Karen Walker; Vena Cava; Alexandre Herchcovitch; Rachel Comey; Preen
from left: Jonathan Saunders; Herve Leger; Threeasfour; Temperley London; Ports 1961
THREE MORE BEHIND THE JUMP, YO!
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Tags: ADAM, Alexandre Herchcovitch, clothes, dating, dudes, fake dates, For A Date With, Harry Nilsson, high fashion, Jonathan Saunders, Karen Walker, Keith Moon, Laura Jane Faulds, Ross Geller, stoner boys, The Troubz
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Monday , February 9, 2009
FOR A DATE WITH: The V-Day Dream Date Edition Pictured above: The Holy Grail of Laura Jane Dream Dudes (l to r)- Neil Young; Ari Gold of Entourage; Tom Verlaine of Television; Adam "Ad-Rock" Horovitz; George Harrison; Jim O'Rourke Last week, I made up imaginary outfits for imaginary dates with imaginary dudes. Because I am alone during V-Day Week and want to delude myself into feeling better, this installment of FITW features imaginary outfits for imaginary dream dates with imaginary dream dudes! Since this task was such an exercise in self-indulgence to begin with, I decided to pull out all the stops and make my dream date outfits out of crazy-expensive shit from Net-a-Porter. Let's try not to think too hard about the fact that, instead of going out on hot dates with Rishikesh-era George Harrison, I sit around and make stupid Photoshop collages on my computer. Am I a loser? HAPPY IMAGINARY VALENTINE'S DAY, LAURA JANE!!
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Tags: Adam "Ad-Rock" Horovitz, Ari Gold, chloe, delusion, For A Date With, George Harrison, imaginary dream dates, imaginary shopping spree, Jim O'Rourke, Lanvin, Matthew Williamson, Neil Young, Rishikesh, self-indulgence, Stella McCartney, Tom Verlaine, Valentine's Day
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