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Thursday , May 14, 2009
Laura Jane's Addiction: "The Member of the Wedding" by Carson McCullers
The Member of the Wedding by Carson McCullers is my favourite novel of all-time, even though it is not a novel. It's a novella.
The Member of the Wedding is the story of a scrappy 12-year-old gingerette named Frankie "F. Jasmine" Addams. Frankie is an exact representation of my 12-year-old self, except for that she is from the Deep South instead of the Great White North, and is not named Laura. Frankie is obsessively stoked on the idea of attending her big brother's upcoming wedding, and fancies that she will run away to Alaska with the bride and groom after the ceremony. The majority of the book takes place during the days leading up to the wedding, as Frankie wanders around her small Southern town, sweaty nail-clipped hair plastered to the back of her neck, sucking down bottles of Nehi like a regular Hawkeye Pierce, scarfing down corn pone, and making harsh fun of her dweeby next door neighbour John Henry. Importantly, The Member of the Wedding is Southern Gothic as all get out, and there is nothing in the world I love more than Southern Gothic, except maybe for some solid Kinks-brand Suburban English Gothic.
But really, The Member of the Wedding is a complex and emotive ballad written to one's first taste of the acrid truth that, in life, nothing unfolds the way you wanted it to. It stunningly captures the emotional neutrality that hits like a lame punch to the stomach when you finally see how things really are and realize that everything you thought to be true yesterday was just a lie you constructed to stave off malaise. And you are bummed out by this, but mostly are too exhausted to care.
Copies of The Member of the Wedding are a dime a dozen (well, mostly they are one dollar) at every used bookstore on the planet, which serves as further proof that people are fucking idiots and I hate them. I snatch up copies of TMotW whenever I find them, and then I give them to people as presents. I always like to have a big stash of them stacked up in my bedroom. That way, when I have guests over, I can be the hostess with the mostess and gift them with a free book.
Seen above is an image of the four hottest copies of The Member of the Wedding I currently have in my trusty pile of MotWs; however, the two middle editions are the prized possessions of my entire life, and I will never give them to anybody. Except maybe I'd give the green one to Ray Davies. Maybe.
Tags: books, Carson McCullers, F. Jasmine Addams, Laura Jane's Addiction, Laura loves The Kinks, Ray Davies, Ray Davies is a genius, Raymond Douglas Davies, Southern Gothic, summertime, The Member of the Wedding
Friday , May 8, 2009
Laura Jane's Addiction: ZOOBORNS
Happy Friday! Welcome to my brand-new column, Laura Jane's Addiction. Laura Jane's Addiction is actually just We're Obsessed with a new name. It is not necessarily limited to things I'm literally addicted to, since I'm not addicted to a whole lot, except for cigarettes, and it would be really boring to have an entire column devoted to smoking. Or would it? I also hope the day will never come when I have to write a column called Laura Jane's Addiction: HEROIN. That would be heartbreaking.
As far as things that I'm not addicted to go, I'm pretty close to being addicted to looking at pictures of baby animals on the Internet. First there was Cute Overload, then came The Daily Puppy, which was soon to be bookended by the equally awesome Daily Kitten (check out Speedy, BTW- he's so cute and weird and skinny!), and now, I have finally found the Holy Grail of "cute baby animal blogs"- ZOOBORNS!!!
Zooborns is a blog dedicated to showcasing all the baby animals born in all zoos across the world. Zooborns makes me happier than anything, except
heroin cigarettes. I wish I worked at a zoo. Maybe I should work at a zoo? Maybe I should become a zoo tour guide? Or maybe I should just keep checking Zooborns fifty times a day. That seems easier. Here are some of my favourite Zooborns:
1. LION CUB BABIES: Laura Jane of nogoodforme.com endorses "Lion Cub Babies" as being "The Cutest Baby Animals of All." Right!?!?!
2. RED PANDA BABIES: So cute, they make Normal Panda Babies look like JFK after he got shot in the head.
4. HOG BABY/ARMADILLO BABY: I wish I was cradling the hog baby and cooing into its little hog ear; the armadillo baby is mostly just creepy, but interesting. Who knew that armadillo babies' shells are soft and pink? I didn't. Until ZOOBORNS.
5. A VIDEO OF A BABY CHEETAH AND A BABY PUPPY PLAYING: I can die happy now.